Why be better when you could aim to be your best?

After all, who doesn’t want to ‘live their best life’? Aren’t we all trying to ‘be the very best we can be’? We’re glad you asked!

The first answer is a simple one. Thrillingly for us, it came to us in the process of digging into new concepts of organisational psychology. Not only did it clarify why we want to help you feel, lead and be better, it fed our appetite to learn! Win win!

Both of us have Learner in our signature strengths. We are both endlessly curious to know more, why is it like that, show me how! To us there is no end to the fascinating information still out there waiting to be discovered and the process of gaining those new skills and that new knowledge can distract us from everything else. That’s where the difference between ‘better’ and ‘best’ comes in.

Best implies an end point. You reach it and you’re done. No more change possible. Umm… is this you? Anyone happy to claim being a completed human with no further capacity for growth? Anyone? Not us, that’s for sure!

Better, ah, now there’s an intriguing idea. Experience proves over and over again that there is always something new to learn, improvements to be made, updates, if you will, to our beliefs and behaviours and practice.

The second explanation comes from science. Simon Sinek’s book The Infinite Game captures the difference between better and best beautifully and with evidence backing it. He explains the concept succinctly here.

An effort that is finite has:

  • Known players
  • Fixed rules that cannot be changed
  • The objective / outcome is agreed upon at the beginning
  • There’s a beginning, a middle, and an end
  • And… there’s a winner (which means there’s also a loser)

Any undertaking that is approached with an infinite mindset has:

  • Known AND unknown players – you might never actually know everyone who is in the game
  • Changeable rules, able to be updated and revised at any point and by anyone
  • The objective is to perpetuate the game AND stay in the game for as long as possible. You accept that the game will go on even after you are out.

Let’s think about why this difference matters.

Leaders who play a finite game are in a competition and they’re in it to win. In a finite game where ‘best’ is the goal there is always a cost and everyone pays it. The underdeveloped and overlooked junior staff who are never able to work to their full potential. The family who take second place behind work. And, in our opinion, the leader pays the greatest price even if they win. Let me say that again. Even if you do achieve what you think is your best… you’re coming off as the underdog. Why? 

Leaders with an infinite mindset improve things not just for themselves, they make things better for everyone. Their legacy is improvement and longevity – of the business, of their team, of their club, of their family. They’re playing a long game where success is defined as leaving things better than how they were when I found them. Knowing that things can always be better means they’re willing to consider alternative views (maybe there’s a good idea here I haven’t heard before?), they invest in developing their people (your contribution is equally as important as mine, let’s make it great!), they’re able to be flexible in process and they’re even prepared to step back and let others lead when they identify that would help things progress.

The world isn’t static in an infinite game and they play for the whole team.

How about you? Are you playing a finite game? OR do you want to leave a legacy, do you want to be part of continually improving things? Do you want to Feel. Lead. Be. Better?

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